the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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