You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Everything about him screamed your future.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
