As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
im having a threesome with these popsicles
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
