oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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