i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Just invented taco cereal.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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