I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize