why do cheetos always look like penises
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
I'm really busy with my period
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