Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
