Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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