READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
