The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
