You're my little dorito
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Randomize
