You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
