Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
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