hell yes lets make some ravioli
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
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