so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
