I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
