Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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