Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
My vagina just recognized that song.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
