Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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