He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
