you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize
