watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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