is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize