he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
