You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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