My boss' voice literally gives me gas
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
