sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
