i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
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