i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
I need a burrito and a hug.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Randomize
