I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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