I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
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