as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
