i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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