just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I think my nap took me to another dimension
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
