Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
