Christians are straight up FREAKS
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Randomize
