We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
