Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
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seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
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Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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