I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I forgot how hot balto sounded
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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