Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
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