isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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