No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
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