idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
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How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
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BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
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