Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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