Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
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