That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize