The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Rumble strips road head = magical
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
