that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
