Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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